Forum : Pregnancy

hi

water is supposed to help but there is no guarantee that you still wont tear. you could try massaging your perineum to help soften the area and make it more stretchy, but again, no guarantee that you wont tear. unfortuantely it is just one of those things that you do just need to go with and see what happens. i hope my story gives you some encouragement though...

my first baby, 73 hours from start to finish. got to hosp fully dilated, pushed for 4 hours but baby got stuck so i ended up in theatre for an episiotomy and forceps delivery. took 8 days until i was no longer needing pain killers from the episiotomy and by 10 days things were certainly much more comfortable but it was 6 months before things felt totally back to normal. my daughter is now 4 yrs old.

i had my second baby 10 weeks ago. it was an absolute fantastic experience! waters broke slightly prematurely (36+5) but i didnt go immediately into labour so was given 48 hours and was then going to be induced. at 45 hours after my waters broke i went into spontaneous labour. contractions were immediately 2 minutes apart and very painful. 1 hour and 15 minutes later i was ready to push. 17 minutes of pushing and baby was born! so just over 90 minutes in total! i did have a second degree tear along my old episiotomy scar but recovery from the tear was so much better and much easier than the episiotomy. within 3 days i was sitting down much more comfortably and by a week everything felt totally normal. sorry, tmi, but we were having sex again 6 weeks after my second baby's birth. it took us 6 months after my first was born.

i hope that gives you some help, but other than massage and perhaps delivering in water there isnt a lot you can do. it is just one of those things...

good luck

Hi hun, i'm in pretty much the same situation. My little boy will be 2 in april and i'm 25 weeks with my second. I also had a ventouse but didn't have an episiotomy and ended up with awful internal tearing. It was 6 months before I stopped getting pain every day and our sex life was non existent for about a year. I've also heard that water births can help stop you tearing and my friend who just had one said they're fab for pain as well. She didn't tear and her little man was a decent sized 8 15. Unfortunately my hospital doesn't offer water births so I am seriously considering asking for a section especially as I have a heart condition and I know they'll be quick to jump in with ventouse or forceps again. My midwife just laughed when I said i'm not letting them anywhere near my with them again so i'm not expecting any help from her. Let me know how you get on or if you find any good tips. Good luck x