Forum : Pregnancy

it must be a shock to him and maybe he will come round after hes thought about it. how old are you both? dont do anything you dont want to do, he was 50% responsible for you getting pregnant in the first place, if you want an abortion then dont have one, and if you do make sure its not just because hes pressuring you into it. eventually he will have to listen to you, its your body that has to go through with it. good luck xx

he may be in shock but you decide what you want if you want to keep it then keep it.
dont let him pressure you . i think his being selfish in a sense because he wont talk to you.
you will be okay im bringing up 4 on my own . at the end of the day he was there too
so will have to face up to it at sometime good luck xxx

My partner was the same too - he wanted the abortion, I was just in shock. I knew I couldn't have one but he did keep pushing it (and at one point tried to bribe with with a pair of faith shoes!). He wasn't nasty about it though.

In the end, I told him out straight that I was having this baby with or without him! He nodded and supported my decision and wants to be involved.

We are still together and very happy. It wasn't planned pregnancy, been dating for 3 months at the time and we are both students so hence the long time to decide. For several weeks he was almost in 'mourning', certainly depressed but then he came along to the first scan and left tearful because he couldn't believe that at one point a few weeks back, he wanted me to either abort, miscarry and he even wished I had cancer....

It isn't easy for you at all but you need to think what you want first, and tell him. But you also need to be the supportive partner as it is also a shock for him (and I swear men get bigger mood swings than we do!) and male friends are really pants at things like this where as we have our friends we can rely on.

There is a fantastic book called the 'blokes guide to pregnancy' I got one as a present for my partner, I read it first and up until I read this book I believed that he was being, well honestly, a [censored], but reading this gave a really good insight into the guys perspective and once he read it he realised he was not alone, and that the majority of guys have some sort of 'freak out' even with planned pregnancies.

Good luck with it all hun
Caz xx

thanks everyone, this is making me feel a lot better

i told him dtraight tody that i was doing this with or without him, and he called me names and said he hated me, i know he's in shosck and i'm doing my best to be understanding, i do know what he's on about, but i cant bring myself to actually abort, so that option is out. hopefully now he's been told exactly what i'm doing and why, maybe by the time we have the scan (in about 6 weeks) he'll feel a little better, then the actual scan might do him the world of good,

we have only been together for about 2 months aswell cookies!

so his reasons are understood, but it's just not happening xxx

Hi i'm 18 and 17 weeks pregnant
i was 8 weeks when i found out i was pregnant, and i had told the dad.
we had previous pregnancy scars, and he left me cos he couldn't handle it.
but when it came to be real this time, he stuck by me, that was until the next day where out of the blue he phoned me n said he couldn't do it, and that i made myself pregnant.
Shortly after that he was sending me hurtful emails and texts, just because i decided to keep the baby. We were together on and off for 2 years!
I am so glad that i have him out of my life, i changed my number and cancelled my email.
I'm now excited because i am having a little boy, and i have the best mum and dad there to support me.
Women can cope on there own, young or old, you just have to have the will power to do so!
take care xx

hi im 19 years old and 20 weeks pregnant. my partner and me decided to keep our baby, but he has now told me that he didn't want to be with me any more. He has been more interested in getting drunk with his friends and when i mentioned about the baby he said he couldn't care less.
i don't know what to do for the best now. I don't think i can do this on my own, but an abortion seems so wrong, considering a week ago i wanted this baby so much. Any one have any past experience or views on they would do in my situation.xx

Hi im 35 and my lo dad walked as soon as he found out i was pregnant, i got 2 older boys 9 n 10 and wondered how i would cope starting all over again, it doesnt matter how old you are, if you want this baby then dont be pressured into anything, speak to your doctor there is lots of support out there, you are not alone honey. If you want to chat i here for a while before my boy kicks me off anyway!!

hi im 20 years old and 36 weeks pregnant with my second child, i had my first child when i was only 15 and my boyfriend at the time was older, he wanted to be involved but when my son was born he didnt want much to do with him and so i brought him up on my own for 2 years , i was fine bringing him up on my own then i met my current boyfriend who took my son on as his own and is standing by me for this one too. if you do decide to keep your babies it is possible to do it on your own and there are plenty of men who will take you and your kids on, so dont be afraid to do it yourself

good luck with it
nat xxx

Some people are dads, some people are not, I guess.