Forum : Mums

being a mum isnt easy when you have a husband and mine is great so doing it alone is definately not easy. i was a single mum with my first now 16 and i was just 16/17 at the time.
my hubby works shifts so i spend lots of time alone with my daughter now 7 months and i get lonely. so dont be down on your self you may be finding it very hard to cope but in anycase you are coping.... be proud of your self its the hardest thing you wll ever do you wont be alone forever..
good luck xx where are you from if you dont mind me asking?

Have you spoken to someone else about this? Health visitor or doctor or something? Please dont feel like you have to suffer through this on your own.

Hi, I have so much admiration for single mums its such a hard job being a mum and my hubby works 12 hour shifts but even that 10mins that he has my son before bedtime is a break! You definitely need to see your gp and get some help and support, there may be single mum groups in your area where you can meet other mums in the same position. Do you have any family or friends near you that can help out a bit? Sometimes just having enough time to have a shower in peace and a cuppa and sandwich is enough to make you feel so much better!
I've suffered from depression for years and recently went back on a low dose of a/ds which has really helped - they are not for everyone but they can help and make things seem more relaxed and manageable. My son was a nightmare for the first 12 months and it peaked around 8-9 months and I was literally tearing my hair out with him some days, but the older they get the easier it gets and he's now 18 months and I get kisses and cuddles all day so those first few hard months were definitely worth it!
Try to get out of the house as much as you can even if its just a walk to the park, and take as many offers of help as you can. But do speak to your gp, if its pnd then there is lots of support available to you.
It will get better xxx

we're all expected to be super woman these days, and doing it alone definitely makes the job 100 times harder... it's easier said that done to say "come on, can't you see that you're doing a great job", we often don't believe that much in ourselves, but it has t0 be said that this is by far the hardest job on the planet. There is a reason why I was attracted to your post, it sounded really familiar to where I once was and I hope that I can just give you food for thought here. When I had long periods of feeling so low, and I too am on my own for most of the time being a military wife, I referred to the following site by complete chance: I think the words I put in the search engine were enough to flag this site to me.. I think that in itself was the first step to helping myself and finding out what was going on and my reason for feeling so low and alone: http://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/mentalhealthinformation/mentalhealthproblems/postnatalmentalhealth/postnataldepression.aspx
It confirmed a few things for me, and then I spoke to my GP. I also underwent psychological support with a mental health team as I was actually suffering quite severely from PND. It was the best move I could have ever taken, going to my gp just to talk about how I was feeling. She identified something and gave me the help that I needed right away. I was living with these thoughts and feelings for some time and was always able to 'cope' with them and make excuses for the way I was feeling... let us not jump to conclusions here with you as we have exceedingly tough jobs, but your first step should be to really think about how you are on a day to day basis objectively and then talking to someone. I truly mean every word in this post and believe that you too can nip this thing in the bud, but the key thing will be to talk... I promise you that but take the first step today you're just prolonging your misery. With love, a big hug and a huge amount of support all the way from Portsmouth! xx

oh bless ya, i bet you are doing a great job. Being a single mum isn't the ideal situatation for any woman, but you must remember we don't live in a perfect world. And that you will get through this stage. Speak to your GP and don't suffer in silence.

Thinking of you, xxx there is lots of love and support on this site, do feel free to add me as a friend, I'm always up for a chat if you like.
LK 36wksxx